Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Losing It

Yes, I know I'm horribly behind... I'll try to update you on what's happened since the roadtrip to Seattle.

I came home near the end of August and stayed off the forbidden i.t. treatment for 30 days, then went and got another brain MRI. And found out near the end of September that I didn't pass it.


The imaging showed leptomeningeal metastasis on the Vth and VIIth cerebral nerve running from the Internal Auditory Canal to Meckel's cave in the soft tissue of the brain; and a 6-mm by 3-mm cancerous lesion on the right side of my spinal cord at the base of the brain/top of the spine (C1 level). And unfortunately, the leptomeningeal mets is once again in the form of zuckerguss.

OK, so now I've been diagnosed with metastasis to the brain and LM for the THIRD time. Take a deep breath and go ahead and assume it's still just as impossible to survive as it was the first two times I survived. FORGE ON.

So the time-consuming rounds of doctor appointments and consultations began again. (You simply cannot believe what a full-time job it is for those of us who fight cancer from this side.) And meanwhile, the responsibilities I normally address are left undone...which really gets to be a problem when it's something like filing taxes with the IRS before the October deadline!

DH was obviously getting more and more overwhelmed by the load; in addition to the normal 14-hr day spent at work, DH has to take care of EVERYTHING else these days. The latest diagnosis (and the accompanying decline in my capabilities) was simply too much; I could tell the stress was getting to all of us in the family. We desperately needed a break, any we could get.

So we contacted a reliable accountant with impeccable integrity in Dana Point (
Chris W. Johnston, CPA) at the very last durn minute and begged him to please take us on as clients. (He did and even gave up his Saturday; thank you very much, sir!) And then we did the only sane thing we could do -- we ran away from home.

Yep, we just threw some sleeping bags and clothes into Big Blue and took off with $15 cash between the two of us late in the afternoon one Friday. I, of course, could not stand the fact that we have not made it to the Sierras this year, so I navigated us north. And we spent four glorious nights and days just LIVING.
So stay tuned as I try to wade through my pictures and write up what I can whilst going through treatment for brain mets again...